i didn’t think i would be okay

i didn’t think i would be okay after R broke up with me. i put too much faith in him and not that that’s a bad thing, but i forgot that life doesn’t always work according to plan. but, like, i’m fucking killing it! i’m going to europe next month with a guy that i think i like. lets call him U. i hate that i have moved on so quickly but the more i think about it, the more i realize how truly unhappy i was with R and how i counted on him to make me happy and it was unhealthy because in reality, he didn’t make me as happy as i could have been and as happy as i am. so i think i like U. but i don’t want to make assumptions that we are semi/actually exclusive but if we’re going to europe i’ve got to think that he probably likes me too as more than a hook up (but trust me, the hook up is great oh my god).

so there’s where i am. i’m happy, i’m traveling, i’m casually seeing a guy and i like casual because there’s no pressure to talk all the time (but it is nice to talk) and we hang out a lot, i stay over a decent amount. he asked about my scars once but was nice about me deflecting the question and didn’t push it. i don’t want to have the “what are we” talk though because i like what w have. i like it being relaxed. and honestly, he’s moving to boston in september for a job so like who even knows what will happen after that so i’ll enjoy where i’m at and yeah maybe summer is for sinning but damn i’m still fucking loving me and that’s what matters.